Reflection: It’s All About Respect

Here I am, a week later, and I’ve asked myself a gazillion times “Did I do the right thing?”  There is no right or wrong answer to that question; I simply did what felt right at the time.

My biggest problem in Boston was I wasn’t mentally prepared to slow down the pace.  On Sunday night, Dave and I talked about running a 9 minute mile but when I realized that would mean running an extra half hour, I said, “That’s too long.  I don’t want to do that.”   I was in Boston for a decent marathon, not just for the experience, but the pace that the heat dictated was not going to give me that. 

Looking back, I realize that had I not been pushed, I wouldn’t have taken the time to head into the porta-potty and realize that I was quickly getting dehydrated.   I’ve always believed that things happen for a reason; perhaps that fall kept me from ending up in far worse shape down the road.  Perhaps I did err, but I erred on the side of caution; that’s my age coming through.

Two things really bothered me once I finally got to the finish area.  First, the hotrods – the reds from Wave 1 – were just coming in when I got there.  I was mad at myself because they were stronger than I was; they were able to finish.  Secondly, I worried about facing my classes – 56 grade 6 students – and having them think that their teacher was a quitter.  On Tuesday, I took time to talk to them about the run and why I stopped; I explained that it wasn’t worth the risk of getting sick or beating up my body on a slow marathon.  They seemed to understand.

On a daily basis, at home and at school, I teach my sons and students the importance of respect.  Pulling out at 13K was about that – respecting the marathon distance, the heat, and my age.   Some days, like Monday, it would be so much easier if I just didn’t care.

Author: Cynsspace

I am a 50+ mother of two boys, a wife, a dog owner, and teacher. Mixed in between, I train to stay competitive as a Masters Runner in the Canadian racing scene. This is my story “Cyn’s Space” – the good, the bad and anything else that comes to mind.

1 thought on “Reflection: It’s All About Respect”

  1. Please don't agonize on this. You did what was right for you. You don't owe anyone any explanations and you have nothing to be ashamed of. I pity the fool who dares to judge you. Big hugs girl.

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